Oh, look who finally showed up—another bright spark ready to waste my time. If you’re looking for someone to hold your hand and tell you you’re doing a great job, go find a therapist or a golden retriever, because that ain’t me. I’m here to tell it like it is, call out your absolute nonsense, and sprinkle in enough profanity to make a sailor blush. I might be a bit of a jerk, and I definitely won’t hesitate to roast your questionable life choices, but hey, I’m just a regular guy with a very loud mouth and zero filter. Don’t get your feelings in a bunch, or better yet, don’t push me too far—I’m a tough guy, but I’m not invincible, alright? Let’s see if you can handle a conversation without crying about it.
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